Those 2 Bionic Angels:

Farrah made me do it!

The sad passing of Farrah stirred a renewed interest in my lost films. When I say lost, I mean in the attic. Boxes of video tapes from 25 years ago languishing and some growing a visible moldy film on the edges of the tape. I haven’t owned a VCR in ten years. People ask me all of the time, “When are you going to transfer those old movies to DVD?” My standard reply, “I’ll get around to it one day...Mom.”

Inspired by Farrah, Monday I set out for the Loaves & Fishes Thrift Store and purchased a used four head Hi-Fi VCR for $14.99. I immediately screened Those 2 Bionic Angels and set about restoring it as best I could. The color is faded, the quality is less than original but the magic, the magic is still there.

Remember this was back in the day of video cassette technology. Editing consisted of two tape decks a turntable and a microphone, also very experimental of its time were graphics generated by the very powerful Apple II computer. I know, I know, way ahead of my time. This was 1985.

Yes we were kids and we mostly made up the dialog as we went along but there is a certain charm about it. It’s the period I think that makes it so awesomely bad that it’s good plus the acting. I just got tired of them replacing that third angel so I X’d her out permanently. I also made the two remaining angels be bionic for no particular reason other than for fun and it was all the rage to be bionic at the time.

It's an ambitious length of 23:39 so watch at your leisure and without any further fanfare (stick with it you won't regret it) I present the newly restored 1985 classic, Those 2 Bionic Angels starring my cousin her friend and myself with deleted scenes brought to you by L’Oreal, my version of the Andie MacDowell hawking L’Oreal cosmetics commercial that once played every other effin’ incessant minute.

Feel free to enlarge for that big screen experience.

It's Time To Play,

So in my ongoing effort to apologize to Mr.Peenee but not to get back in his good graces of which I never was, The winner of the “Name That Puppy” contest goes to Mr. Peenee for his clever name 2-Pack!



















2-Pack is so cute. He’s smart very smart just like his God Father Peenee. He’s house broken but that’s thanks to my little helper Shareeka who bosses him around and has made him her own puppy. Really I haven’t done a thing, Shareeka did it all. He answers to 2-Pack or 2-2 or Pack or Pack Pack.
























Peenee wins an all expenses paid coupon to the glamorous resort of Tucson Arizona.
























Also a special holiday vacation ‘clipping’ to the Romantic Isle of ocean charm, Atlantic City with it's mild and inviting VITOZONE climate. Is Atlantic City still there? Is it still Romantic? Only Peenee will know.












Bonus gifts include an assortment of 15 Doris Bryant Cat Calling Cards and a Howes Bird Attractor for his cat Saki. Doris does amazing likenesses of cats and the Howes Bird Attractor will provide hours of entertainment for Saki.












I always say If my birds are fed then so are my cats...

Thanks to everyone who played along, I auditioned each and every name that was submitted. 2-Pack was clearly the winner and the only one he responded to. Everyone who participated will receive a Canewood Farm Ham. Except for DuPree who knows what he's getting...

Peenee:

So earlier in the week I put my foot in my mouth and commented to Mr. Peenee that he sort of had a John Lithgow thing going on.



















I rest my case.




















I prefer the word “remindful” as in, “You are very remindful of John Lithgow” another approach if one dares to compare two beings is to respect the one you are speaking to, “You know John Lithgow kind of favors YOU.”

I’m sorry Peenee if I offended you.

Farrah-February 2, 1947 - June 25, 2009:

Info was spotty today and I rarely ran across internet savvy big-rig trucker tricks to check in with the news agencies at the truck stop but I felt the passing of Farrah psychically nonetheless. It’s a sad day a very, very sad day.




















I’m wearing black right now. A black spaghetti strapped sequined pantsuit with a plunging neckline. I’m backcombing, feathering and frosting my Farrah Fawcett Make-Up & Hair Styling Center applying her make-up and tanning her skin. Preparing for the memorial followed by graveside services to be held in my backyard.
























I was only twelve years old when Farrah first visited me in a dream. I was dazzled by her Ultra-Brite smile, self-possession, and waspy beauty while watching Charlie’s Angels. She had “IT” and more IT than anyone since Marilyn. I wanted to be her. One day I cleaned out a small tool garage attached to our house and declared it headquarters for my own Charlie Angel detective agency and therein resided the Farrah bathing suit poster.




















Around that time Farrah visited me in a dream at a disco party at my detective agency, she and Lee Majors were guests sitting on a ledge with me that rimmed the 8’ x 10’ office trimmed with an oriental carpet, beige sofa with burgundy piping, multi-line speaker-enabled business phones, Venetian mirror, ginger jar lamps, and an enormous plaster replica Buddha head sculpture on a gold gilt and bronze doré Louis XIV commode. It was lavish.
























Several more dreams have followed most notably the one where it was rumored that Farrah owned a beach house on Ono Island in Perdido Key Florida just down the road. Anyway in my dream I kidnap Farrah and strap her to my roof and make her tan again holding her prisoner in the blazing sun while frosting her hair with an occasional drop of water to drink wrung out from a rag.

Disturbing.

The other more pleasant dream was escorting Farrah to a Hollywood party arm-in-arm. She clung tight to me all night introducing her friends. She was tiny and nervous and frail but spectacular wearing a white halter top and a gigantic black handbag over her shoulder. Flipping her hair and laughing.
























I felt my psychic link to Farrah being severed yesterday when I woke up and thought about Farrah and heard the news that her condition was worsening. I really would like to have another Farrah dream tonight but that’s pushing it.
























I’d like to thank Viva for being such a good Farrah Fawcett friend. She shares the same Farrah connection and has also shared numerous pictures of Farrah that I have never seen including the one at the top of this post. Thank you Viva and it’s understandable that the Mean Dirty Pirate Internet Friends of Farrah Fawcett Fan Club newsletter will be delayed this week. On a totally related note Tatum must be suffering tonight as she once was romantically linked to Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett was her step monster.
























It seems only fitting that Farrah be robbed of the spotlight by Michael Jackson in her death much like she was robbed in her career. I imagine Farrah and Michael Jackson noticing each other in the line for Heaven. A single file line of white robed recently deceased set against a backdrop of all white and a golden mane leaning and straining out of formation. “Hey Michael did you die today too? Weird. Hey look up ahead it’s Ed McMahon. Far-Out.”

On the Road Again:

I’ll be on the road for a few days as a good little Roadwhore should be servicing the Oasis Truck stop on county road 39. Package deals available. Lunchtime specials. Group rates. Handicap and senior discounts. Coupons will be honored. “Hey baby, Wanna see the Grand Canyon?”

Fawcett/Travolta

It’s a Farrah Fawcett / John Travolta kind of day! You know how they say that stars are easy to recognize because they have large faces and big heads? Jill’s is twice as big as Barbarino’s. Star Power.

Meanwhile at The Old Watson Murder Farm:

Guests arrive by steamer for an exciting Murder Season.

















Chauffuer driven motor coaches whisk murder parties to their luxurious destination.


















Well appointed suites await at The Old Watson Murder Farm located on an idyllic alligator infested canal.


















Appropriate murder attire is expected.



















Each day your trained trapper will bring the thrashing alligator to the surface for you to murder as he guides your party on two morning alligator hunts and one afternoon Dodo bird kill.



















Ladies murder groups are welcome and “Special Lady Murder Guides” are provided for just such occasion.

















Alligator Joe is on hand for skinning your catch. Joe will carefully salt pack your excess alligator meat, delivery is guaranteed to arrive fresh as the day you murdered it. He also crafts exquisite footwear and luggage.

















Madame,"Cook", boasts 850 recipes for murdering and preparing alligator meat.
























Each guest will murder at least one alligator per day or the cost of the hunt is free.

















Our murder hunts are GUARANTEED!
























This is truly a once in a lifetime murder adventure that your family will always treasure.

Viva Las Vegas:

Faithful reader of this blog and President of the Mean Dirty Pirate Internet Friends of Farrah Fawcett Fan Club and Editor in Chief of the Mean Dirty Pirate Internet Friends of Farrah Fawcett Fan Club Official Newsletter, Laura has gone and become a genuine STARLET!

She’s also gotten herself a brand new blogger I.D. Ladies and Gentleladies please welcome back to the stage for the very first time, Viva as in Viva Las Vegas.

Viva was so kind to forward me her news accompanied by this glossy official photo that includes her. She’s starring in an extra capacity in the major Hollywood Summer Movie, The Hangover!

Viva said,

"My husband has a Speaking Role & Screen Credit as the Pit Boss in a scene with Heather Graham!

As for me...I worked as an extra in the film.

You can see me (just above the baby) in this "official" photo...people say I look a lot like Cybill Shepherd...sorry Farrah!

Or you just might see me walking by as the sunburned man is helped into the car in front of Caesar's...look at the left corner of the screen...whoops, blink and you missed me pointing at the fountain with another lady."

Amazing! I’ve been anxious to see this film but now I have a reason too.

Congratulations to the next Farrah Fawcett, Ms Laura/Viva!

Good choreography never goes out of style:

Everyone says the Eighties are back.

I say NAY.

It’s the Seventies all over again.